drat fink

shredding units

"Wait a minute. Shredco? What is this, the Jetsons? Anyway, it's true: Upon further investigation, there really is a Shredco. Its motto, as currently rendered on the firm's site, is: "You threw it away ... or so you thought. Now you're being sued. Don't just throw it away ... Destroy it!"

harken, i hear footsteps

"German financial giant Deutschebank and the terrorist attacks of September 11 - including previously documented links to insider trading based upon events of 9/11 - no press agency or government entity is questioning why certain banking institutions in Kuwait and Bahrain with deep financial ties to the Bush family have been overlooked in the President's supervision of a so-called "worldwide crackdown on terrorist financing." Reuters reported on 11-7-2001 that the Treasury Department added 61 additional people and organizations to the President's original Executive Order of September 23 -- including banks in Somalia and Nassau, The Bahamas. But mysteriously, no banks in Bahrain, Kuwait, or Saudi Arabia were named in either the original order or its expansion."

tete a tete

"I'm disappointed that, after all that build-up, you don't have a detailed long-run plan for fighting terrorism, but I'm happy to see you embracing my hobbyhorse, "world governance." The first time I heard you do this was while you and I were debating in early 2001 in New York. At the time I wasn't sure whether you meant it or were just staging a pre-emptive strike, trying to keep me from lecturing you about the need for an enforceable biological weapons convention. (Only a year earlier, I had used you as a classic example of a world-governance skeptic.) But I'm starting to think you may be serious. Your sentence about patriotism becoming "obsolete" was dreamier than even I normally get!"

drive thru arrest

another bush family drug related arrest. its a shame. her insurance must not have covered mental illness. why else would she be buying zanax with a fake scripts. just another cause (and an apt one) for the bushies to rally behind.

orange man group

"Then I saw The Picture. You know, the one that appears to have been taken on the set of a gay male heavy S&M training film or a Robert Mapplethorpe photograph. About eight or nine submissives are shown kneeling, their knees grounded into the gravel, their legs crossed and shackled under them, their arms manacled in front, their hands bizarrely mittened. They are blindfolded with black, high-tech-looking goggles, earplugged (or are those earphones?) and practically gagged with surgical masks and electrical tape, their day-glo orange outfits blowing in the Cuba Libré breeze, revealing sections of their naked flesh. One of the Orange Men appears to be losing his pants. Obviously, he can't pull them up."

hide and go seek

"WASHINGTON (CNN) -- President Bush personally asked Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle Tuesday to limit the congressional investigation into the events of September 11, congressional and White House sources told CNN."

range life

"It was as if he had turned his back on his Texas fetish and made room in his heart for us. George W. Bush had a last laugh of sorts vis-à-vis the snarky Manhattan types, were anyone inclined to laugh: Not only did this city—perhaps even its liberals—join the rest of the nation in branding this man a hero; now even his staged histrionics have been adjudged the mark of a wise and brave statesman. Since Sept. 11, New York has been loving George W. Bush. But that brings me, in a roundabout way, to my question: Can this marriage be saved?"

al for one

"By my count, the 36 days following the Nov. 7, 2000, presidential election generated not less than 36 books and one Ph.D. dissertation, plus countless articles and essays. To examine and understand the historic Florida vote count, however, no reasonable person is going to read all this material, excepting perhaps another Ph.D. dissertator. Nonetheless, being an election junkie, I was sufficiently interested to read almost half of them."

khan newman

hamid and his capes are the talk of the town. talking points considers poll tested presidentially proffered nicknames for the raffish one. dratfink has adopted 'Karsai' as an eponymous teeth-gritting epithet.

all the way to the bank

"The President of the U.S. is a very popular guy and he simply slayed the VIPs at the Alfalfa Dinner the other night, hosted by the famous Washington, D.C., club. These worthies included the cream of U.S. commerce, industry, politics and anyone else you can think of who counts.

The prez said he had good news and bad news from Saddam Hussein. "The good news is he is willing to let us inspect his biological and chemical warfare installations. The bad news is that he insists Arthur Andersen do the inspection!" . . . Speaking of Congressman John Dingell of Michigan, who was stopped by security at Reagan Airport and made to remove most of his clothes, the prez noted Dingell hadn't taken everything off. "Thank God," said George W. "that it wasn't Bob Dole!"

At one point someone said during the program: "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce President Bush, former President Bush and former President Dick Cheney." This got a big laugh."