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I Meet My Match
A kid who I assume to be in high school but claims to be a college student starts talking to me in the video department of a crowded midtown store today. He asks if I'm browsing the anime titles for myself or a gift. I say myself. From that moment forward I am deluged with quantum packets of fan data, my feeble responses batted aside like beams from a pencil flashlight. "Didja know a live action Astroboy is coming out?" "A live action Gigantor?" "Live action Sailor Moon?" "Do you know about the Neon Genesis manga that takes place in the alternate universe where Shinji's living a normal life with his parents? He still pilots Eva, though. Did you know he sleeps with Rei? You know what Rei is, right?"
"Yes, she's a vat grown entity derived from the blood of an Angel."
"And what else?"
"And DNA from her father."
Derisive snort. "Her father?"
"Sorry, her mother."
"Anyway, remember how Shinji likes Kaoru in the series? In the manga he hates him, hates him."
"Is Kaoru gay, like in the series?"
"Yeah, but when he comes onto Shinji in the manga, Shinji gets mad and pushes him away."
Midway through our conversation the kid's father comes up behind him, taps his shoulder and says, "I'm going to that cafe downstairs so I can have a drink." I'm trying to browse the DVDs but the kid keeps going, breaking my concentration, talking about Tenchi Muyo, Ninja Scroll, the Battle for the Planets box set ("also known as G-Force; also Gatchaman"). "Cowboy Bebop is amazing animation for 1998. Amazing. Cartoon Network is trying to get them to extend the series more, but they won't. Did you hear they're expanding Adult Swim?" "Did you know that in Japan they have stores full of anime several floors high? Just anime!" "Oh, here's a box set I'm going to have to download at my school. Downloads suck, some virus always gets in." "Oh, the manga shelf! Gotta go, nice talking to you."
After he left, the spirit creature inside me was exhausted. I reported back to the Oni Dimension: "All is well on Earth."