All right that's it. If I could string together a moment or two of coherence you'd really be getting the whatfor now.

West bashing may be ok, but Texas? This site stinks with Texans. (My point precisely says AW). -badabing-

"Dearth of trees in Texas"? I have twelve acres of trees in Texas not to metion a Tulip tree or two in North Carolina, and a Sycamore already dwarfing the Rocheblave house so let me just jump in here...(veins popping, temples and neck.)

(Ok, maybe you do have a few trees in Texas but not any big ones)

Here jimlouis cocks back his sticks, fingers dangling at their ends, his birdcage puffed out, and emits a budweiser enhanced spittle flecked retort.

Oh yeah, what about that Treaty (live) Oak in Austin. (Not deciduous says AW, and besides, wasn't it poisoned to death by a local sicko?).

Yeah, well how come they gotta be deciduous? I think they put that guy on death row.

...dammit, where's Tom Moody when you need him? Come on TM, get him. He can't get away saying we have little trees. Can he? Bill? Can he get away that? Or is that why we all fled, to get away from our little trees? Oh dreaded epiphany.
- jimlouis 5-04-2001 11:12 pm


Live oaks in Texas grow to enormous size, but by Alex's phallocentric logic, size only matters if it's vertical. Texan-bashing is all just bluster on his part, anyway, because, as he admits, the mighty tulip is a shrub next to the Redwoods further west.
- Tom Moody 5-05-2001 12:01 am [add a comment]


You gotta know I already let him have it last night. In Amarillo we got a whole dambd forest of great big *long*(not tall) redwoods. Long cause they'r lying on the ground petrified. They'r "mighty" petrified our mighty redwoods. mesquete ? how bout them. thorny and tasty for the bbq. / cedar groves suitible for real-good fence posts. uh er anything else you wanted me to remind em ? The mighty coconut palms of Padre Island ? (imports again) He's right Jim, we got not-a-lotta to brag on treewise. Remember those fake tree's in Freds ?


- bill 5-05-2001 12:12 am [add a comment]


  • One of my favorite Texas trees is the bois d'arc, which natives pronounce "boh-dark." It's not much to look at--it has multiple trunks and dense, skinny branches. But once a year it drops melon-sized, chartreuse fruits all over the streets and sidewalks. These "hedge apples" (or, as my grandfather called them, "horse apples") are covered with a lumpy, vaguely reptilian hide. They're dense and inedible, and about the only good thing you can say for them is they hold their shape well as you kick them down the street.
    - Tom Moody 5-05-2001 12:29 am [add a comment]


    • And rolling them (we grew up calling them horse apples)out onto East Kiest Blvd. in South Oak Cliff, they were great for that.
      - jimlouis 5-06-2001 5:19 am [add a comment]


      • Wow, you guys have all the folk names, and come by them naturally. I feel like Lomax on the prairies. My dad told me they were Osage Oranges, which turns out to be the “official” name. Thought to be native to a fairly small range in TX, AK, OK, the tree may be the best the area has to offer. Still, there is the sex issue. The species has separate male and female trees, which is no better than the way we do things. I think the national tree should have perfect flowers: male and female all in one; all trees bearing flowers and fruit. Just ask the Wheel, he knows OO.




        - alex 5-06-2001 8:39 pm [add a comment]


  • link
    - link- (guest) 8-09-2004 11:22 am [add a comment] [edit]






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