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PORANDO REPORT : Neck Brace Appreciation Klub
They're baaaack…
The Post's clueless Dan Aquilante reviews the new Butthole Surfers recording. He must've missed "Pepper" with that head wound.
From the band's site.
all right to the Danish parliament for starting a green tax on product packaging--more you waste more it costs you, very biodegradable no tax--COOL
a spam?? or truth?
-----Original Message-----
ARKANSAS CITY (EPA) A Little Rock woman was killed yesterday after leaping through her moving car's sun roof during an incident best described as "a mistaken rapture" by dozens of eye witnesses. Thirteen other people were injured after a twenty car pile up resulted from people trying to avoid hitting the woman who was apparently convinced that the rapture was occurring when she saw twelve people floating up into the air, and then passed a man on the side of the road who she claimed was Jesus. "She started screaming "He's back, He's back" and climbed right out of the sunroof and jumped off the roof of the car," said Everet Williams, husband of 28-year-old Georgann Williams who was pronounced dead at the scene. "I was slowing down but she wouldn't wait till I stopped," Williams said. She thought the rapture was happening and was convinced that Jesus was gonna lift her up into the sky," he went on to say. "This is the strangest thing I've seen since I've been on the force, said Paul Madison, first officer on the scene. Madison questioned the man who looked like Jesus and discovered that he was dressed up as Jesus and was on his way to a toga costume party when the tarp covering the bed of his pickup truck came loose and released twelve blow up sex dolls filled with helium which floated up into the air. Ernie Jenkins, 32, of Fort Smith, who's been told by several of his friends that he looks like Jesus, pulled over and lifted his arms into the air in frustration, and said "Come back here," just as the Williams'
car passed him, and Mrs. Williams was sure that it was Jesus lifting people up into the sky as they passed by him, according to her husband, who says his wife loved Jesus more than anything else. When asked for comments about the twelve sex dolls, Jenkins replied "This is all just too weird for me. I never expected anything like this to happen."
NYC subway cars being dumped off the Delaware coast to form an artificial reef. Sort of like container-housing for marine life.
Did anybody else see the amazing picture in the Times last week of a bald eagle attacking a young girl on a N.H. beach? I can't find it on line anywhere, but someone got a really good shot of it. (I don't think the girl was very injured.)
tropical storm, Deeeeeaaaaannn
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
I put the toast I wrote for my family reunion here, appended to my July 4th post. The MacRitchies are a sept (a "subfamily", with a different name) of Clan MacIntosh. The toast is meant to go with Scotch Wisky, and references our clan motto: "touch not the cat bot a glove". "Bot" is "but", i.e. "without", meaning, don't provoke us, or you'll get clawed. On a tangent, Ritchie is another MacIntosh sept, which means that Madonna is now married into my clan. As such, I feel obliged to express my concern over her use of Cabalistic imagery. On the right side of this page you can see that the Tree of Life has been incorporated into the logo for her current tour. Traditionally, this sort of material was reserved for the initiated. I do believe that we have reached a point in our development when some things that were formerly hidden should now be brought to light, but I'm a little suspicious of M's usage. I don't want to doubt her sincerity, but I don't like seeing this sacred symbol bandied about in commerce. As far as I know, she's still a novice, and this smacks of spiritual pride. Maybe I'm too hard on her, but it's not clear to me how her newfound mysticism squares with other mythologies she deploys, like the sub-Tarantino video her husband directed for her. The current fashion for Cabala is reminiscent of the 1960's taste for Eastern spirituality. I'm sure a few people learned something, but most of it was superficial at best. In any case, I don't think that people who aren't Jewish should manifest this material in Hebraic form. The Tree exists outside of Jewish mysticism, and Cabalistic technologies have long since been incorporated into Western spiritual systems, including Christian ones. It's also worth noting that the typical diagrammatic Tree is highly intellectualized and abstracted. The "real" thing actually is a tree, and has roots; a sort of mirror image tree which grows down into the Underworld, engaging deeper levels of Tradition, without which the supernal tree could not stand upright.
as received as promised : " Akin to the nugget of Pure Evil in "Time Bandits," this videogame may be The Most Fucked-Up Thing In The Universe / Japan is some twisted muthafuckaz / Link #1 is a photo from someone's website; link #2 appears to be some kind of promotional piece / I am honestly at a loss for words; look if you dare"
wrong and wronger
My mom in Dallas mailed me some Doonesbury clippings from last week. GWB is a * with a cowboy hat !
Has this story only been in the Australian media, I wonder?
A NUCLEAR bomb, 100 times more powerful than the one dropped on Hiroshima, is lying 10km off the east coast of the United States.
Until now one of the most closely guarded secrets in US military history, its existence has been confirmed in newly declassified documents which reveal how it was dumped in the sea after a mid-air collision more than 40 years ago.
Pentagon officials, though admitting they do not know the bomb's exact location, insist it is safe.
Replica Bison Testicles - Focus of Crime Spree...
I can't seem to post a picture by putting description inside double quotes. Am I trippin? Don't answer that. I have to decide now if I want to take part in the shaving (having him shaved by a professional, god, I can't believe I just said that) of my longest surviving (14 year old) cat. He's going rasta. The vet says he would be more comfortable with a shave. I'm scared. Won't it be psychologically, uh, pyschological? Just when you think its safe not to have a life... Thanks for the adivce or not, I won't take it because I have to make the decision right now, when I sign off, so save it if you want, I'm sure to face similar dilemas down the road, maybe I'll take your advice one of those days, so make it good, or not. Dammit. I'll probably be back here Friday, which is when the cat will be shaved. Dammit, I guess I'll go along with it. I hope it's not too psychological. I hope everyone is happy in the end. That cat has been with me (well technically not with me because he stays here at Dumaine) since Oregon, where he was born. On the move to Seattle he was there when I was for the first time assisted, instead of hassled, by a policeman. Landmarks.
shedding pounds and inhibitions
Hot site making the buzz around our company this morning: http://www.funcalculator.com/
Click on the Orgasmic Calculator or the Farting calculator - beware of your speakers being on too loud in a corporate setting... do a simple calculation online and enjoy!
Not sure what to make of this. Strangely beautiful in a personal grooming sort of way. Click on the swirlee at the bottom left for much much more. (via harrumph. Requires flash.)
wwf (world wildlife foundation) sues wwf (world wrestling federation)
for the good doctor---"a conservation group surveying its land found a black gummed maple that is more than 500 years old and a slender knotweed which hasent been seen since 1952..." (NHampshire)
From worldnewyork:
There's a casual New York blogging, web-type get-together this Friday, August 10, at Rain Lounge, North 5th and Bedford in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, at 7 p.m. Everyone's welcome. We'll be the doughy white guy in the black frame glasses.
Picture of an exploded whale. While not the same one featured in the famous Steve story we heard last night it is somewhat interesting (in a coincidental sort of way) that I came across this today. There's got to be a better way...
for $19.95 you can watch paul morgan cut off his feet with a guillotine. proceeds go to the puchase of hydraulically powered limbs his insurance company won't pay for.
New Jersey Wildlife News
I spotted three pheasants today in Liberty State Park, one male and two female. Actually, they might have been grouses. I started walking toward them, and they ducked under a chain link fence into an area marked "No Trespassing - Hazardous Materials," thus evading me. I swear this happened.